#21 Stronger (than yesterday)

I love lifting weights AND exercising my French voting rights.

This post gets a bit more personal, as I’m talking about my fitness situation. I don’t want to trigger anyone who may currently be struggling with their body image. If you need to skip this one, I understand.

I believe that for most of us, conversations about weight and body image are loaded. Little Lou had a VERY round face, which meant that I was often called “fat” by my classmates. Consequently, I can still think of myself this way with my weight taking up more headspace than I would like. I file this away in my “bad feminist” drawer.

But I also suspect that it’s not just me because that is the nefarious nature of misogyny?

This social media post sums up the particular vein of body shaming and diet culture that I was exposed to growing up. Folks, it’s worse than I’d remembered and it feels like each generation must suffer. Today, while we may be having more open conversations about fatphobia, we’re also seeing the rise of Ozempic as a weight-loss tool, beauty filters, as well as the ever-moving bar of conventional beauty. Feel free to vent via the comments.

I didn’t grow up in a sporty family. The gym featured heavily in my university days and when I first moved to France. The weights room always felt intimidating. (Mansplaining at the gym? Non, merci!) I’ve flirted with running on and off for the past decade but I can’t say that I love it. But when I started lifting weights back in 2021, my fitness finally started to feel like it was in my own hands. I had sessions with a personal trainer (Jean-Pierre, aka JP) three times a week at my local boxing club, where my partner was already a member.

In the third session, I had to do burpees. I tried, I failed and at the end of the class, I cried in the locker room. There were many moments like this during my eight months of personal training. As soon as I felt comfortable with a weight, we’d go heavier or add some element to make it spicier. Today, I do all sorts of moves; devil press, weighted squats, snatch, clean press, box jumps, wall balls, power clean, lunges, push-ups, and even pull-ups (begrudgingly and with the help of elastic bands.)

I’ve now been going to cross-training classes at the boxing club since September 2021. The ambiance is great. Everybody comes to sweat, there’s no posing, and we sometimes gang up on JP to complain that there are too many burpees / pull-ups / whatever exercise we hate that day on the workout board. One of the strongest people there is a woman and she pushes me (gently) to lift heavier if I’m hesitating. A female coach has recently joined the team and always makes me up my weights, which feels satisfying (once the session is over).

These days, the only person I’m competing with at the gym is myself. Fitness goals keep moving and that’s the point. This year, I’m looking to stabilise my weight while building muscle and getting stronger. Last week, heavier weights were lifted and that felt incredible but this week I was wiped out by a stomach bug and “only” made it to the gym twice. When it comes to my relationship with my body, there’s more work to be done but I’m consciously trying to appreciate it more (and what it can do).

My first ever deadlift rep at 80kg.

Power cleans, squats and push press at 15kg, who am I?!

Any talk about losing weight is, understandably, a thorny issue. It feels like a rite of passage for girls and women to experience disordered eating at some point and we are all aware that fatphobia (grossophobie en français) is thriving. The body positivity movement has become a marketing tool for brands and fitness influencers are doing more harm than good as this NYTimes article highlights.

I’ve grown up being bombarded with messages that the world values slim and conventionally attractive women the most. But I’ve never met society’s expectations. Most days, there are bigger issues to be dealing with and I also understand that the less space women take up, the more it suits the Patriarchy. But some days, I sit rather uncomfortably in my skin.

To finish on a positive note, I have learnt some distraction techniques along the way. They include looking up the benefits of women lifting weights, going for a walk and listening to the podcast Maintenance Phase or reading posts from She’s A Beast.

I also think that Ellie is onto something...

France must vote to keep the far right out

Being able to vote in France is a privilege that I don’t take lightly. Today is round two of the French legislative elections and we are on tenterhooks, hoping that the Rassemblement National (RN) does not win the largest share of votes. Realistically, it’s going to be very tight.

If the worst happens, it would result in a far right majority in the National Assembly, including a “co-habitation” between Emmanuel Macron (President) and RN leader Jordan Bardella (PM). This is a terrifying thought because it would have dire, if not life-threatening, consequences. Many people living in France would have their rights taken away from them.

Of course, the RN is exploiting feminist topics for their racist ends via le fémonationalisme. Popol media explains (in French!)

lea.chamboncel

A post shared by @lea.chamboncel

Take care of yourselves, Lou x

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